


Savage Sunday

by LilyK



Category: Starsky & Hutch
Genre: Gen, transcript
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-27
Updated: 2020-12-27
Packaged: 2021-03-11 09:48:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,481
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28349412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LilyK/pseuds/LilyK
Summary: A pair of small-time crooks steal a car, not knowing it has fifty sticks of dynamite in its trunk, set to detonate at five o'clock. In a race against time, Starsky and Hutch have to locate the stolen car car before it explodes.
Kudos: 3





	Savage Sunday

SAVAGE SUNDAY

Season 1, Episode 1

Original Airdate: September 10, 1975

Directed by Jack Starritt

Written by Fred Freiberger

Created by William Blinn

Story Editor: Robert Lewin

Summary: A pair of small-time crooks steal a car, not knowing it has fifty sticks of dynamite in its trunk, set to detonate at five o'clock. In a race against time, Starsky and Hutch have to locate the stolen car car before it explodes.

Cast:

David Soul ... Det. Ken 'Hutch' Hutchinson

Paul Michael Glaser ... Det. Dave Starsky

Antonio Fargas ... Huggy Bear

Bernie Hamilton ... Capt. Harold Dobey

Edward Walsh ... Wilbur Sloane

Bob Delegall ... Gregg Morton

Arthur Peterson ... Henny Wilson

Hope Summers ... Sarah Wilson

Ray Vitte ... Tony

T.J. Castronovo ... Marty (as Tom Castronova)

Dick Wesson ... Ed

Suzanne Somers ... Sally Ann Sloane

Erik Kilpatrick ... Huey (as Eric Kilpatrick)

Dave Shelley ... Geoffrey Mills

Louis James Oliver ... Ted

Skip Lowell ... Billy

**Exterior - Day - In The Torino**

Hutch: (reading) "Confidence, Huey, confidence!" He looks at him and says, "Just what you need." It's pretty bad. Oh, come on, Starsky

STARSKY: I just don't believe it's Sunday.

HUTCH: Why? You don't mean you'd rather be relaxing poolside with a blond lovely than chasing vicious criminals and murderers?

STARSKY: Yeah, something like that.

HUTCH: Why don't you convince Milty to restrict his drops to weekdays?

STARSKY: Very funny.

HUTCH: Hey, Starsky. Better push it.

STARSKY: Yeah. Hate to keep Milty's connection waiting.

  
  


**Interior - Day - Restaurant**

WILBUR: Well now, lookie here, lookie, here. That's our baby.

GREGG: That old tub?

WILBUR: That old tub is like a thousand other old tubs. Who could identify it?

GREGG: Yeah. Well, see, the sports car is more my style. But I get your point.

WILBUR: Well, let's do it. You get the tip. That's good coffee. Hello, folks. Looks like it's gonna be a nice day.

GREGG: You're a gentleman and a scholar.

An older couple sit down at a booth.

HENNY: You all right, Sarah?

SARAH: Fine, Henny. Just fine.

HENNY: I shouldn't have let you come.

SARAH: Now, we're in this together.

HENNY: But, Sarah, there are fifty sticks of dynamite locked in that trunk. Even a good bounce could set it off.

Outside, Wilbur and Gregg steal Henny and Sarah's car.

SARAH: They couldn't go off. You set the timer for 5:00 this afternoon.

JENNY: Well, I'm not an expert. It could go off prematurely.

SARAH: Well, if it did, we'd be together. I still feel as if I should drive into the courthouse garage with you.

HENNY: Absolutely not! You know it'll just take a few minutes to park it and then, when we have our coffee, we'll call The Chronicle.

SARAH: Henny! Our car! Do something!

HENNY: What can I do? Call the police?

  
  


**Exterior - Day - Liquor Store**

WILBUR: Ah, man would you turn that thing off? You're driving me crazy with that.

GREGG: You got something against music?

WILBUR: Aw, come on.

  
  


**Interior - Day - Liquor Store**

WILBUR: Hey, baby, lemon pie. Your favourite.

GREGG: No, man. I like brown doughnuts.

LIQUOR STORE CLERK: Can I help you gentlemen?

GREGG: Yeah, maybe some wine.

CLERK: Red or white?

WILBUR: Green, like in money.

CLERK: Hey, now wait a minute.

WILBUR: Shut up and open the register.

YOUNG MAN (off screen). I'll get it, Dad.

WILBUR: Well, now, you just cool it.

  
  


**Exterior - Day - Public Street**

STARSKY: Milty!

HUTCH: How you doing, Milty?

MILTY: Just give me a few seconds.

HUTCH: Dealing drugs on Sunday. Shame.

MILTY: I was taking a walk.

HUTCH: Spread them out. Spread them out.

STARSKY: He was throwing the evidence all over.

HUTCH: Well, you got it. Good work, Starsky.

MILTY: Watch out for my suit, man! It's a new suit.

STARSKY: Shut up, Milty!

MILTY: What do you mean, shut up?

DISPATCHER: Repeat, they are armed and dangerous. Escape car is a white, two-door  
1963 Chevrolet, unknown license. 2814 Folsom. 909 on Eighth Avenue...

HUTCH: Let's get out of here.

MILTY: What are you guys doing?

STARSKY: Come on.

MILTY: I didn't do nothing!

STARSKY: Get in the car!

(car chase ensues.)

MILTY: You guys didn't read me my rights.

HUTCH: Not now, Milty!

STARSKY: Read him his rights.

MILTY: Yeah, read me my rights!

HUTCH: Shut up! You have the right to remain silent.

MILTY: I got a right to remain alive, you mean. Slow down! Slow down!

HUTCH: You have the right to speak with an attorney. Is that enough?

MILTY: Hey! Hey, 35 miles an hour is the speed limit! Thirty-five. Do you hear me?

HUTCH: Did you make out the plates?

STARSKY: No.

HUTCH: Can you get any closer.

STARSKY: You think I'm trying to lose them?

HUTCH: Very funny.

GREGG: Watch the truck!

MILTY: Watch out for the truck!

HUTCH: Starsky!

STARSKY: Get out of the way!

HUTCH: Well, we lost them.

STARSKY: Him too.

HUTCH: Him too.

  
  


**Interior - Day - Teddy's Body Shop**

WILBUR: Hey, Teddy!

TEDDY: Where'd you get this car?

WILBUR: Coffee shop.

TEDDY: Where'd you get that bread?

GREGG: The liquor store.

TEDDY: And I work my tail off for 3 bucks an hour? Man, I wish I had the guts.

GREGG: Guts? What's there to be scared of?

TEDDY: Hey, man, the slammer. The thought of my going to the slammer gives me the screaming meemies.

WILBUR: Man, 210 lousy bucks.

GREGG: Wow, That ain't no bread at all.

WILBUR: Ain't even enough to pay my bookie.

GREGG: So, what we gonna do now?

WILBUR: We're gonna do what we're the best at. We're gonna score again. Only this time, we'll make sure it's a big one.

GREGG: What's big that's open on Sunday?

WILBUR: Just leave it to me. I know a place.

GREGG: Yeah, but see, if we go out in that it'll be smothered in blue uniforms before we hit the first stop sign.

WILBUR: Not if we paint it and change them license plates. Hey, Teddy, you got some old license plates around?

TEDDY: Yeah. I hauled a wreck in. Ohio plates.

WILBUR: Good. Tell you what I'll do. I'll give you 20 for the plates, and I'll give you 20 for the paint.

TEDDY: Yeah, that sounds all right. What's your favourite colour?

GREGG: Just like you, old buddy. Green.

WILBUR: You something.

  
  


**Exterior - Day - Liquor Store**

HUTCH: Wanna tell me what happened here?

MILLS: Sure. I was in the shop next door. The gift shop, picking up a little something for my wife. It's our 15th anniversary.

HUTCH: Congratulations.

MILLS: Thank you. Well, anyway, I heard this...

  
  


**Interior - Day - Liquor Store**

KID: What about my father?

MILLS (heard from outside, off screen): I heard the crash of bottles...

STARSKY: His eyes are wide open and clear as a bell, kiddie. Take it easy. He's gonna be fine. Here you go. That's a good boy. Now tell me what did you see?

KID: Not much. Except the guy who hit me was big and black.

MILLS (heard from outside, through window): 6-2-1 -C-l...

HUTCH: You wanna hold on a minute?

MILLS: Sure, of course.

HUTCH: Hey, Starsky. Come here.

(Starsky goes outside.)

HUTCH: Excuse me, Officer. Starsky, this is Mr. Mills. Mr. Mills, Detective Starsky.

STARSKY: Pleasure to meet you.

HUTCH: Mr. Mills here is a very observant man.

MILLS: Well, I try to be. You see, I was in the shop next door. The, ah, gift shop, picking up a little something for my wife. It's our 15th wedding anniversary. Well, anyway, I heard this backfire, you see.  
Then I heard a crash of bottles. Then I saw two men run from right there, jump into the car, and the car was parked right in that spot.

STARSKY: White Chevy.

MILLS: A white Chevy, right.

STARSKY: Don't suppose you got the license?

HUTCH: He sure did.

STARSKY: Did you write it down?

MILLS: No, sir. I pride myself on my memory too. I already told Detective Hutchinson the number.

STARSKY: So, what's the problem?

HUTCH: I haven't got a pencil, Starsky. That's why I asked you out here. You have a pencil?

STARSKY: No, I don't have a pencil.

MILLS: Sir? Officer? I have a pencil.

STARSKY: Thank you.

MILLS: And

STARSKY: Piece of paper. Thank you.

MILLS: Now, that was 6-2-1...

STARSKY: 6-2-1.

MILLS: C-l-E.

STARSKY: C-l-E.

MILLS: Right. Very good.

STARSKY: Here's your pencil.

MILLS: Thank you.

STARSKY: Here's your paper.

MILLS: Thank you very much.

HUTCH: That's good work, Starsk.

  
  


**Interior - Day - Eastside Home for the Aged**

HENNY: Did you gentlemen want to see us?

STARSKY: This is Detective Hutchinson. My name is Dave Starsky.

HENNY: Could we go in the sitting room and talk?

STARSKY: Sure. Sure. Do you own a 1963 Chevrolet, license plate 621 CIE?

HUTCH: And where do you keep your car parked?

HENNY: In the parking space out back, right outside our window.

STARSKY: Your car was used in a robbery over two hours ago. Didn't you notice it was missing?

SARAH: Well, it wasn't missing from here. It was stolen from the parking lot at the Quality Coffee Shop. We had to take the bus to get home.

STARSKY: Could you tell us why you didn't report this matter to the police?

SARSH: You'd better tell them, Henny. We don't want anyone to get hurt because of us.

HENNY: Well, we weren't anxious to report it to the police because... Ah, because there are fifty sticks of dynamite locked in the trunk and it's set to go off at 5:00 this afternoon.

STARSKY: Why?

HENNY: This place. This home is a rattrap. The plumbing only works once in a while. There's a leak in the roof. And the food... Why, talk about garbage.

SARAH: We pleaded with the city for two years. They promised that they'd do something, but they never did.

DOBEY (on phone with Hutch): They've got what?

HUTCH: That's right. Fifty sticks of dynamite set to go off at 5:00 p.m. And that gives us about four hours.

DOBEY: You stay there. I'm gonna put you on hold. Put this on the air, top priority. That Chevy in the liquor-store robbery, I want every available man hunting it. It's set to blow up at 5 p.m.

STARSKY: You can't go around raising money for repairs that way. It's against the law.

HUTCH: We're gonna have to take you folks in.

SARAH: We know.

HUTCH: You wanna put the cuffs on them?

STARSKY: You're kidding.

HUTCH: It's regulations.

STARSKY: You know that regulation. I don't know that regulation. You put the cuffs on them.

HUTCH: Folks, if you give me your word that you won't try to escape, we won't need the cuffs.

SARAH: We won't try to escape, officer. Where could we go?

  
  


**Interior - Day - Dobey's Office**

DOBEY: Seems impossible. 500 men on the job and that Chevy hasn't surfaced yet.

HUTCH: Captain, it's 1:37.

DOBEY: What are you, the town crier or something?

HUTCH: I'm pointing out the time.

DOBEY: I know what time it is.

HUTCH: I think you ought to call the radio and TV stations. Have them alert the public.

DOBEY: And create panic? There'd be more people killed racing away from Chevys they've mistaken for the death car than if that dynamite went off in the middle of downtown.

STARSKY: I think...

DOBEY: Don't! Still three hours to think. A white 1963 Chevy. It's gotta be somewhere.

  
  


**Interior - Day - Teddy's Body Shop**

TEDDY: What do you think?

WILBUR: What do I think? Man, it's beautiful!

GREGG: Teddy, you are faster than a speeding bullet.

WILBUR: Yeah. I'll tell you, it was worth the 30 bucks.

GREGG: Let's do it.

WILBUR: See you later, Teddy. Pits

TEDDY: All right. Hey, Wilbur, don't scratch the paint, now.

  
  


**Interior - Day - The Pits**

HUGGY: Now, sugar, I believe in women's lib, which means you're entitled to steal as much as any male bartender. But keep this in mind: There's thievery and allowable thievery and I allows just a little thievery. And don't forget: Don't throw the money you're ripping off in the bar sink, because it gums up the plumbing. Hey, you guys, ain't you supposed to come in through the alley?

STARSKY: Figured you wouldn't mind.

HUTCH: It being Sunday.

HUGGY: Um hm. Cops coming in through the front door give the place a bad name. What will my customers think?

STARSKY: Got a minute, Hug?

HUGGY: Starsky and Hutch. They ain't on the take, so no freebies. My new barmaid, Dianne Sills.

HUTCH: Hello.

STARSKY: Hello.

DIANNE: Hi.

HUGGY: Have a seat. Okay, what's happening?

STARSKY: The usual. A little robbery, a couple murders.

HUGGY: Now, why should today be different than any other?

HUTCH: Well, today's a little different than the usual. The jokers we're after are driving around in a stolen car, rigged with a bomb, set to go off at 5 p.m. And they don't know it.

HUGGY: It's 2: 15. That gives you three hours to find them and tell them about it.

STARSKY: That's plenty of time if we knew where to look.

HUTCH: Maybe not. If they hit one stone, one pebble in the street, it could bounce that timing device up and...

HUGGY: Then everybody would know about it, right?

STARSKY: See our problem, Hug?

HUGGY: Well, I dig your troubles. What else?

STARSKY: Well, they hit a liquor store on Glenville and Third.

HUGGY: Some bad dudes, huh? Let me make some calls, and I'll get back to you.

  
  


**Interior - Day - Bank**

WILBUR: All right, get in there, darling! Okay, fill it up. You sharks don't miss a day, do you?

GREGG: Everybody just stay cool and nobody gets burned. Keep your hands where I can see them.

WILBUR: Come on. Come on. Make out you're late for a date with Robert Redford. Come on. Come on. Come on. Get him!

  
  


**Exterior - Day - Hot Dog Stand**

STARSKY: Hey, Hutch?

HUTCH: What?

STARSKY: Don't forget the chili.

HUTCH: It's one plain and one with mustard and onions and relish and sauerkraut and chili.

DOBEY (on police radio): Zebra 3, Zebra 3, this is Dobey.

STARSKY: Go ahead, Captain.

DOBEY: Huggy Bear's just called in here. Thinks there may be a contact for you over at Jackson Park.

STARSKY: Gotcha, Captain. Hutch, we got something.

HUTCH: Where to?

STARSKY: Jackson High School.

HUTCH: What you got?

STARSKY: Huggy says we'll find out when we get there. Where's mine?

HUTCH: I dumped it.

STARSKY: You dumped it?

HUTCH: You can't eat while you're driving. You're dangerous.

STARSKY: I'm also hungry. Next time, you drive.

  
  


**Exterior - Day - Jackson Park**

HUEY: Come on, man.

TONY: All right. I'm gonna throw the rope-a-dope on you.

HUEY: Let's go! Go, go!

TONY: All right. All right. Let's go.

STARSKY: Okay.

HUTCH: Okay. Hey, hey! That was a beautiful shot.

TONY: What grade you in?

HUTCH: You wouldn't believe it.

STARSKY: We're friends of a guy who says you can tell us about some bad news that blew in from Denver last week.

HUEY: Man, they don't look like no friends to me, do they, Tony?

TONY: No, Huey, they look like the fuzz to me.

HUEY: Yeah, yeah.

STARSKY:Kid's bright.

HUTCH: You guys are a little short to play basketball.

TONY: I can't understand it, man. We eats our full ration of chitlins every day.

HUTCH: Hey, listen. What we want to know is worth about 50 bucks to us.

TONY: Hear that, Huey? These dudes are high rollers, man.

STARSKY: Maybe these two kids wanna gamble. Maybe you wanna play a little two-man basketball, huh? You win, we double the 50, and you don't have to tell us nothing.

HUTCH: And if we win, you tell us everything we want to know, and we pay you zip. That's worth a try, isn't it?

TONY: Hey, Huey, you hear that, man? Now, let me get this straight. We win, you give us 100 bucks, and we don't have to tell you nothing.

HUTCH: But if we win...

HUEY: Okay. Okay. How many points?

TONY: Right.

HUTCH: Ten points, Starsky?

STARSKY: You got it.

HUTCH? What is that? What is that? Two points a basket?

TONY: Yeah, man. Ten points is five baskets. I'll tell you what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna let you take it out first.

TONY: You ready? You ready now, right? You ready? You ready now? You sure?

STARSKY: Two points!

HUTCH: That's what he said. Two points a basket, right?

TONY: Right.

STARSKY: Who takes out? You or us?

TONY: Us.

STARSKY: Okay.

TONY: Come on. Let's go.

HUTCH: Who's your man? I got it.

TONY: They got the ball.

STARSKY: Excuse me. Excuse me. That's four points for the good guys! Four points for the good guys.

TONY: That's all right. That's all right. All right. Special.

STARSKY: Here we go.

HUEY: Come on, man. Hey!

TONY: Hey, wait a minute. Wait a minute.

STARSKY: Hey, we do something wrong?

TONY: Huey, I think we've been hustled, man.

HUEY: Yeah, I know, by experts.

TONY: Hey, look here, y'all. You know that 50 you was talking about at the top?

STARSKY: Yeah.

TONY: If we forfeit the game right now, will you make it 20?

STARSKY: Well, like we were saying we're friends of a guy who says you can tell us about two guys that came in last week from Denver. Salt-and-pepper combo.

HUEY: Salt-and-pepper combo?

TONY: You talking about the liquor-store holdup today, huh?

HUTCH: Yeah.

TONY: We heard those guys hang out at a bookie joint we know about.

HUEY: Yeah.

TONY: Black dude's name is Gregg something or...

HUEY: Yeah, and the other guy's Wilbur Sloan.

HUTCH: Sloan, huh? Where's the bookie joint?

TONY: Monty's Bar.

HUEY: It's in the back. On Fifth Street.

  
  


**Interior - Day - Monty's Bar**

STARSKY: I got the back.

HUTCH: Okay. May I have a beer, please?

BOUNCER: Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. It's private back there, man.

STARSKY: Hey, not to me, man. I got a bundle. I want to bet it on something special.

BOUNCER: Who sent you?

STARSKY: Jackson. Yeah, that's his name. Jackson.

BOUNCER: Nobody's home by that name. You better take off.

STARSKY: Ah, hey, come on. What's the password?

BOUNCER: Take off!

STARSKY: Two words? What? Hey!

HUTCH: Okay, turkey, you tell him you got two high rollers out here. Now, what's the word?

Starsky kicks down door to private room.

STARSKY: All right, that's it!

HUTCH: Take it easy. Everybody easy. There's nothing to worry about unless you're doing something illegal.

STARSKY: Don't turn it off. How will we know who won?

HUTCH: Out.

STARSKY: Okay, out. Go ahead. Come on. Come on. Take your drink with you.

HUTCH: Out. Don't worry. Come back later for your payoff.

STARSKY: Another day, another dollar, huh?

HUTCH: Out. Out. You, stay!

STARSKY: You gonna be here later for the payoff?

MARTY: We're a small operation. We can afford maybe 500 a week. Right, Ed?

ED: Take it easy, Marty.

HUTCH: There's no percentage in taking it easy. I'm still listening.

ED: Oh, well, in that case, maybe we can sweeten the pot. Say, 700?

STARSKY: We got a black guy called Gregg something and his pal, Wilbur Sloan.

MARTY: We never heard of them.

STARSKY: We know you handle their action.

ED: Them? Sure. They were in here a couple of hours ago to make a payoff. They're good Joes. Never welshed on a bet yet.

HUTCH: They've got integrity, Starsky.

HUTCH: Yeah, nice to know we're looking for a class act.

MARTY: If you're gonna bust us, bust us!

ED: Take it easy, Marty. Who said anything about a bust? Right, fellas?

HUTCH: Right.

STARSKY: No, we want you to stay visible. Friends call in a bet, you give us a call. Number's on the card.

HUTCH: Now, you help us collar them, and we might forget about this address.

ED: Yeah?

STARSKY: Yeah.

ED: Well, in that case, I guess I should tell you. There's this go-go dancer, Sally Ann. She used to be married to the Sloan guy. She works the Princess Discotheque near Washburn.

STARSKY: Ed, I predict a bright future for you.

HUTCH: Would this joint be open now?

ED: Day and night, every day of the week.

Starsky and Hutch leave.

MARTY: Ed, we got no future if those two find out we gave out information.

ED: Come on. We had no choice.

MARTY: We got a choice. The vigorish. We play both ends, like usual, huh?

They call Teddy.

TEDDY: Ted's Body and Fender. Yeah, I might be able to reach them. What's the message?

MARTY: Look, tell them that two cops are looking for them. Real hard. And tell Wilbur they're visiting his ex right now.

TEDDY: All right.

  
  


**Interior - Day - Princess Disco**

HUTCH: I know what you're thinking. You ought to be ashamed of yourself.

SALLY ANN: Okay. You wanna talk?

STARSKY: Sure. As soon as I can hear again.

SALLY ANN: Well, our customers prefer volume to quality. I have to go back on again in a couple of minutes so if you wanna talk, talk. Okay?

HUTCH: Tell us about Wilbur.

SALLY ANN: Ahh, Wilbur. And then I was married to that weirdo, Wilbur, for two months. And can you believe I see him more now than when we were living together?

HUTCH: When was the last time you saw him?

SALLY ANN: Last night. Oh, about 7:00, I guess. I mean, to put it all out front, the marriage broke up because there was hardly ever a sex scene. Not that Wilbur couldn't get it together, if you know what I mean. It's like, he goes for gambling. You know, the horses, basketball, football. You know, a real sports freak. Every performance I turn on maybe fifty dudes doing my act. In this public joint but in my bedroom, in the privacy of my own home, I'd do it for Wilbur, only for real, and Wilbur would turn on. He'd turn on the football games. He'd turn on tennis. It was weird. I was starting to get an inferiority complex. I went to the shrink, and he let me know, using the Socratic method, of course, that it was Wilbur's problem and not mine and that I'd better unload him before he ruined my career.

HUTCH: What about this other guy?

SALLY ANN: Yeah. The other cultural giant. Gregg Morton. He is a rock freak. I mean, he can never get enough of this music.

STARSKY: Do you know where we can find these two guys?

SALLY ANN: Well, um, if they ain't at the bookie joint, and they ain't here, they're usually over  
at my cousin Ted's body shop. Me and my cousin Ted came out here from Denver, oh, about six months ago. Just a minute. I'm on again. I gotta go powder my nose. Bye-bye.

STARSKY: Bye-bye.

SALLY ANN: Bye-bye.

STARSKY: So she wouldn't talk, huh?

HUTC: It's a good thing we didn't ask her anything personal.

  
  


**Exterior - Day - Alley behind Princess Disco**

STARSKY: What do you mean, my type? Geez.

GREGG: Hey! You pigs looking for us?

STARSKY: Let's talk.

WILBUR: Nothing to talk about. It's the end of the line.

(Gunfight ensues.)

DOBEY (on phone): You blew it. You had them cold, but you blew it. In the meantime, it's 2:45. These guys are doing a wheelie around town in a bomb set to go off in two hours.

HUTCH (on radio): Now wait a minute, captain. It's not all bad news. We know who they are. The Caucasian is Wilbur Sloan. And the black is Gregg Morton. We can run a make on them out of Denver.

DOBEY: Well, why didn't you say so? Now look, I want you to hold that line open. Report in every 10 minutes.

HUTCH: Come in, Captain Dobey. I've lost you.

DOBEY: I can hear you, damn it. I said, I want you to report in every 10 minutes.

HUTCH: Zebra 3 to Dobey. I've lost you.

DOBEY: Hutch! Starsky!

STARSKY: Two nylon-lined, steel-belted, double-layered, 60-buck tires.

DOBEY: Starsky! Hutch!

STARSKY: I'll kill those...

  
  


**Interior - Day - Squad Room**

DOBEY: Well, you can go home now, folks.

HENNY: But we can't.

DOBEY: Yes, you can. Your lawyer got you released two hours ago. You're out on bail.

SARAH: We can't leave now, not till we identify these men.

DOBEY: They've been identified. Detectives Starsky and Hutchinson have identified them. You can leave now.

HENNY: Well, come on then, Sarah.

SARAH: Well, we really oughtn't to, Henny. Not until they've been apprehended and we know that no one's injured.

HENNY: Now, the detectives, Starsky and Hutchinson have identified the car thieves. I'm sure they'll be in custody very soon. I have a great deal of confidence in those two young men. Don't you think a lot of them, Captain?

DOBEY: Yes, Mr. Wilson. I think of them a lot.

  
  


**Interior - Day - Teddy's Body Shop**

TEDDY: They usually check in here every day. I don't know.

STARSKY: I mean, that's a habit with them, isn't it?

TEDDY: I don't know their habits. Sometimes they're around, sometimes they're not.

HUTCH: Starsky.

STARSKY: What?

HUTCH: Come here.

TED: I mean, I'm not trying to...

STARSKY: Just don't go away, Ted.

TED: No.

STARSKY: Good boy. You want to come here for a second, Ted? Come on. Now you wanna tell us something about that white Chevy that was standing right here that is not white any more? Look, Ted.

TED: Yeah?

STARSKY: Now we're gonna lay it out for you just one time. Then I want you to start talking. I don't want you to stop until you've told us everything you know.

HUTCH: That Chevy is a bomb. It's set to go off in a couple of hours. Your buddies will get it, and a lot of other people.

STARSKY: And when that happens, you're gonna be up for murder.

TED: Who, me? I didn't do nothing.

STARSKY: And you're going to be up for it all by yourself because little old Gregg and little old Wilbur are gonna be blown sky-high.

TED: Green, man. They painted it green.

HUTCH: Plates.

TED: Ohio plates. They're out of state.

STARSKY: Number?

TED: I don't know. All I know is that they were Ohio plates, and I didn't do nothing! They held a gun on me and said they'd kill me if I told anybody. They took the paint and the plates. Cops. They're weird.

  
  


**Interior - Day - Squad Room**

DOBEY: I'm not gonna play it like that.

HUTCH: Time is running out, Captain. If we appeal to the public through radio and TV, we've got a chance.

DOBEY: We've got plenty of time now that we know what colour the car is and it's carrying Ohio plates. How many two-door Chevys you know are painted green with Ohio plates?

STARSKY: One, but suppose it doesn't surface.

DOBEY: It better, with 500 men on the alert.

HUTCH: A little radio and television coverage never hurt.

DOBEY: Okay. We better put it on the air.

HUTCH: Now that makes sense.

DOBEY: What doesn't make sense is the way you guys hand in your daily reports.

HUTCH: (on phone) Local wire service, please.

DOBEY: (to Starsky & hutch) Once every seven days is not daily. If the department wants you to hand them in every seven days they'd be weekly reports, wouldn't they?

HUTCH: Yes, sir.

DOBEY: Well, wouldn't they?

STARSKY: Yes, Captain.

HUTCH: Hold on for Captain Dobey, please.

STARSKY: Miss your lunch, Captain?

DOBEY: Yeah.

STARSKY: Well, due to certain circumstances, I missed mine. I don't suppose you could spare that extra hamburger?

DOBEY: Hey, look, you get paid just like I do. Buy your own!

STARSKY: Thanks, Captain. I see what you mean.

DOBEY: And another thing... I want those reports handed in daily, neatly typed, in triplicate.

HUTCH: Captain, line two.

DOBEY: And don't you ever pull any of that phoney radio-interference jazz on me. You cut off communication with us, nothing's gonna happen.

STARSKY: Thanks, Captain.

DOBEY: Dobey here. Yeah. I wanna put it on the air every five minutes. Green Chevy.  
Sixty-three. Two-door. Starsky! Starsky! Damn!

  
  


**Interior - Day - Parking Garage**

ATTENDANT: It's my duty to call your attention to that dent in your fender. We cannot be responsible for any...

WILBUR: Yeah, sure. Gregg, would you turn that thing off?

GREGG: What?

WILBUR: I said, turn it off, man. You're gonna hear them in a few minutes.

GREGG: Wow, the world sure is full of killjoys.

ATTENDANT: (to customer) That will be a dollar and a half.

RADIO ANNOUNCER: This important announcement just came over the newswire: The police department is looking for a green Chevrolet, 1973, with Ohio license plates. The men in the car are  
Wilbur Sloan and Gregg Morton. If you hear my voice, Wilbur and Gregg, abandon the car in a deserted area and telephone the location to this station.

Anybody else who sees this car, immediately telephone the police department. (News continues.)  
Fifteen-year-old boy Moss Bradley O'Riley has been seriously injured...

DOBEY: Get on out of here, look for that car!

RADIO ANNOUNCER: ...his family's house. He was taken to... (announcer continues) ...almost took the life of Roger Dome.

An important announcement from the police department on the newswire: If anyone sees a green Chevy with Ohio license plates, please call the police emergency switchboard at 555-6673 immediately. Now the local weather. Sunny and hot today and tomorrow. Highs today...

POLICE DISPATCHER: All units, green Chevrolet with Ohio license reported. Music Pavilion,  
underground parking area. Zebra 3, see attendant, Market Street entrance.

HUTCH: Got it.

STARSKY: How much time we got?

HUTCH: It's 12 minutes to 5.

(Torino races to garage.)

STARSKY: That's it.

HUTCH: Hot-wire. I got the trunk.

STARSKY: Come on! Come on! Get me into the open somewhere!

HUTCH: Less than two minutes! Get him the hell out of here!

(Starsky races out of garage.)

STARSKY: Come on, baby. Come on. Be fast, you lousy watch. Be fast, just this one time.

(Back in garage.)

GREGG: Hey, man, I don't like walking out before the show is over. It ain't professional.

WILBUR: Come on, man, you know I got 500 bet on the Lakers.

GREGG: But it's the middle of the show!

WILBUR: At least I can hear the end of the game on the radio. Hey, listen. listen. You like that noise so much, you stay.

GREG: Yeah, and take a bus home, right?

HUTCH: Wilbur, hold it! You folks get back in the elevator, and stay there.

(Shootout ensues.)

HUTCH: Don't stand there with your mouth open. Cuff him.

STARSKY: Oh.

HUTCH: Hey, Wilbur, this is your lucky day. The Lakers won.

  
  


**Interior - Day - Eastside Home for the Aged**

STARSKY: Councilman Brown has agreed to have lunch with us.

HUTCH: Councilman Brown feels that conditions are often times exaggerated, so he's come to see  
for himself.

STARSKY: To aid in his survey, we have arranged for the proprietor of Huggy Bear's restaurant,  
and noted food expert, to join us.

STARSKY: Well, dig in, councilman. It's the usual Tuesday lunch.

HUTCH: It's pretty good, huh?

BROWN: Not bad.

HUGGY: Councilman, as an expert, it is my considered opinion that whoever refers to this as "food" is in error.

BROWN: Well, I have no doubt it's nutritious.

STARSKY: Have some more then, councilman.

HUGGY: Nutritious? Food should have an aroma, not an odour. Food should caress the palate, not grab the throat, councilman.

HUTCH: We've explained to these good people that you're a concerned public official.

BROWN: Yes, I see your point. But I think that I'm running late so I will relate my experience to the council. Now, if you'll forgive me. How long have they been eating this garbage?

HUTCH: Years.

BROWN: I don't know what I can do about the rats or the leak in the roof, but I will promise you this: There'll be a new food budget tomorrow.

HUTCH: Well, then. For those of you who like Chinese food, we have here...

STARSKY: Boy, do we have here.

HUTCH: Barbecued ribs and chow mein.

HUGGY: And for those who want American, we have hamburgers, hot dogs. And for the discriminating, soul food.

SARAH: I'm not hungry.

STARSKY: Me, I prefer tacos and enchiladas.

HENNY: What kind of food do they serve in the slammer, Detective Starsky?

STARSKY: I tell you the two of you aren't goinginto the slammer. Now, Hutch and I have heard that the two of you are on probation. But if we ever, ever hear the two of you collecting dynamite again...

HENNY: Never.

SARAH: I think my appetite's come back. Pass the chow mein, please... On the other hand, I think I'll have some black-eyed peas and some ham hocks.

END

  
  



End file.
